Our Closet Full of Masks

This is curious to me. People feel compelled to qualify their responses. “What did you do for New Years Eve?” A fitting question for this time of year. From such an answer you’ll receive one of three typical response:

Response #1:

• “I went to a party”

Response #2:

• “I actually didn’t do anything, just stayed home because I just wasn’t up to it this year. And I was tired. And I didn’t feel well…” And ad infinitum…

Response #3:

• “I went on this awesome cruise to Hawaii and partied hard with 10 super-sexy Playboy models as I drank $500 dollar bottles of Cristal and smoked rare Cuban cigars. And this and that…” And this ad infinitum…

These are, more or less, the generic response categories that one would receive from any question posed. Now let’s examine them.

Responder #1: This is what I would call a simple and sincere response. The person is confident and is not afraid to tell it how it is. They aren’t trying to impress anyone, because that simply makes no sense to them. When someone asks a question, they respond with the simple facts — nothing more, nothing less.

Responder #2: This person feels the need to qualify their responses with a reason and/or explanation. The “action” taken is usually the truth, but the qualifier — the “Because” and “And..” — are usually fiction and created on the fly as a direct result of a lingering fear. This injection of fear is a product of not wanting to step out of the Game. What Game? The Game of remaining in good standings within your social circle; and, to a larger degree, as a member of what you define as your Society. This person uses qualifiers as a free pass to stay “cool.” And those that are “cool,” remain as active members of the club — the Game.

Responder #3: This a the response of a total Fake. Having an immense feeling of insecurity within and under the constant illusion that “I” need to one-up “you” and the rest of the world which “I” live in, this person projects their fantasies as truths to feel complete and whole. Remaining in a total state of falsehood, lies, and deceit; this person is as far removed from reality as an ant beginning a journey from one end of a football field to another.

Our responses to questions, situations, anything in life, will always reflect our current nature — our current flow. If we’re feeling risky, we may take risky actions. If we’re feeling that we’ve been betrayed, we may feel like betraying someone else to feel better. If we’re feeling angry, we may act with malice. These are the masks that we feel the need to put on in order to turn into someone other than ourselves — to suit a need, fulfill a request, or whatever it is. Here are a few:

Business Mask:

• “Sure I can get the job done in 2 months, no problem!” [Knowing that it'll take around 4 months] “Sure, it’ll be delivered on Tuesday” [Knowing that it will be delivered on Friday]

Cool Mask:

• “Look at my new shoes, they cost me $500 bucks!” [I hope that he thinks I'm cool now] “Look at that fat-ass walking over there” [ Let me see if I can make them laugh at my jokes -- then maybe they'll like me]

Badass Mask:

• “I’m going to kick your ass!” [ When I said that, I flexed my biceps. That'll let him know who's boss!] “I got totally wasted that night and punched that dude in the face [ I'm a tough-guy -- aren't I?]

And these masks go on an on… Fueled by our egos, maintained by our fears, and protected by our Society… we’ve amassed piles of makes so high, that our closets are overflowing. But do we need to wear them? Do we need to be someone other than ourselves given a particular situation? Do we need to continue playing this game? Maybe. Maybe not. That’s for you to decide.

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