Stop Being A Poser and Live Your Life By Example, Not by Talking

Friday, July 27, 2007 at 12:25pm by David Askaripour in Life

At the age of 11 I was a hardcore skateboarder who was totally in love with the extreme sport. My brother and I would wakeup early every morning and start waxing the neighborhood curbs so that we could effortlessly slide across them with our boards. It was some of the most exhilarating times of my life. Kicking back with my super baggy jenco (remember those?) jeans with the frills and my oversized shirt.

I remember how we skaters always disliked all of the “posers” around school. The posers were the kids who wore the baggy jeans, wore the long wallet chains, wore the oversized shirts, and, of course, always had a skateboard under their arm. But the difference between them and the authentic skaters, was that we “actually” skated and they didn’t. They just pretended to skate to fit in and be cool.

The posers were the bane of our sport. They went around from skate park to skate park just sitting on their boards and casually rolling around from time to time, giving off the illusion that they really skated. But at the end of the day, then did nothing of the sort. It was just a façade. They spoke about how cool and awesome skating was, but they never lived it — only spoke it.

After reading a chapter in the book The Radical Leap, I was reminded of this poser mentality. So many people really think that they are leaders, motivators, innovators, fill in the blank.

But whom are they leading? What are they innovating? Who are they motivating?

It’s so easy to call yourself a leader. So easy! We’ve all become familiar with the response to the question: “What’s your greatest quality?” Undoubtedly, the response will be “I’m a leader.”

If the amount of people who claimed to be leaders actually were, this world would truly be a different place. But that’s not the case. Most people, I believe, are just talking about being a leader, pretending to be a leader, and just creating the picture perfect illusion for the world.

A true leader, get this, leads! He/she lives by example. He actually brings people together. He actually coaxes brilliance out of people. He actually inspires people. He creates an environment where people can express their fullest potential. He provides a shoulder when someone is down. He comes up with solutions that bring about positive feelings within us all.

And he doesn’t do it from time to time. He does it EVERY DAY. It’s his life. It’s who he is. It’s imprinted in his character. It’s not something the he is forced to do, it’s something that he does freely.

So the next time you throw around one of the buzzwords: leader, innovator, intellectual, motivator, entrepreneur, etc… Ask yourself this: “Am I really that person. Do I live my life that way? Or, am I just pretending because it feels good and I like to trick people into believing that I’m something that I’m not?

4 Comments

Leave a Comment