I’ve really been thinking about this concept a lot lately, evaluating and investigating my own life, and my own thoughts, to uncover areas where I’ve been holding myself back.

I found a big one. I found, within my consciousness, major, major fear. A deeply ingrained fear, that in all truthfulness, has been dominating me since I was a little child. This may knock over some sacred cows, but they now need to be knocked over. For all of my life, I’ve been afraid of one fundamental, underlying entity – my parents.

The Fear of My Parents

And let me speak from first-hand knowledge, this is a traumatic, tormenting, paralyzing state of being. I don’t wish it on anyone. I’m not going to delve into all of my thoughts about my parents right now, but I will say with all confidence, that it cannot be the least bit healthy to be scared of one’s own parents.

I have to end this fear. I have to seize control of this situation, otherwise my life will continue in the same holding pattern that it’s been struggling to get out of, for decades now. I have to grow up. I have to say NO to fear, even if it means…

Fear gets held within my body. I can feel it. I feel the stress pains in my legs, I always have. I have frequently felt even more pain in my lower back. I can sometimes see the fear in my face, when I look in the mirror, and it pisses me off, royally. I am not supposed to, meant to, designed to, or destined to live in fear, of any kind. I am meant to live in beauty; a beautiful world of my heart’s creating. I am meant to live in a world of abundant perfection.

Fear Fuels your Problems, Love Soothes them

Fear is the root of all “problems.” Fear stems from doubt, which are anti-forces of Love and confidence.

Love, which when operative, produces Confidence, creates all beautiful and perfect things in the universe. Fear, which is the product of doubt, stymies Love’s creative abilities and darkens the world around you, even within you. Fear, is not an alive, viable energy, like Love. A dark room can easily be controlled by a lightbulb suddenly switched on. Likewise, fear can easily be eliminated by Love switching on.

But all the darkness in the world can’t overpower even a single lightbult.

So it’s clear: Light dominates darkness.

So Fear is just the absence of Love, like darkness is just the absence of Light.

But Fear has no living, eternal source, of its own. There is no such thing as a “dark switch.” You only create darkness by turning off all the lights! Fear and doubt don’t create anything, they only stymie Love’s creative abilities, if allowed to do so. Fear is bondage. Fear is torturous. Fear is paralyzing. Fear is imprisoning.

How many of us live each day scared of a number of things? Scared of failure. Scared of trouble, of disaster. Scared of what people will think, or say. Scared of others’ perceptions.

Scared of something, more than likely, if not some things.

Fear is My Only Enemy

It is clear to me that Fear is my only “enemy.” Fear and its father, doubt. But the good news for me is that I can control this, I can govern this, I can even eliminate this internal wrestling match as I nurture my love, nurture my confidence, nurture my seed of Life inside me.

I know My Life is infinite in nature, the seed inside me, that IS me. I know this to be true. But at times, I’m not able to walk the walk. I can talk the talk, because I’ve learned the language. But like a little boy learning to ride his bicycle for the first time, without training wheels (for me, those training wheels is the corporate environment of “job security” which I loathe and detest), I still get scared. My parents tell me it’s impossible. My friends watch only from a distance, waiting to see that I fall, so they can feel better about remaining in their prisons.

Only a few folks are out there trying to ride this bike of life without training wheels. Only folks like David Askaripour, the Self-Made Chick, etc… Obviously there are others, I’m only saying you will indeed be in the minority at first. It takes a Love and a Confidence like nobody around you has to ride this bike.

Stepping Up to the Plate to Bat Away Fear

To live this life, to create this world you see within you – it’s going to take growing up and kicking fear and doubt in the …

It requires Life’s energy, which is available in abundance within us, but it must be utilized. It must be tapped into. Otherwise it sits there dormant, like a seed sitting on your kitchen table. Doing nothing, producing nothing. Remaining potential, but never being realized.

And Life’s energy is Love. It is the tune we, and all of creation, dance to, as Einstein said.

What I want to discuss today is one final aspect of this seed and this ground. A part that only recently have I actually contemplated, and the part that I’ve never heard anyone else talk about.

I want us to take notice of the invisible part of this Life equation. You see, we can touch and feel an orange seed, or a watermelon seed. And we can also get our hands dirty in topsoil or dirt. And obviously we touch, feel, taste and smell the juicy fruits when we cut them open. Those parts are tangible and visible. They are physical. But my question is:

Why does…

The Seed + The Ground = Fruit ???

What actually MAKES an orange seed literally transform itself into an orange tree, just because it’s planted in the warm soil of the Floridian peninsula?

The answer is very profound. VERY, VERY profound!!!

There must be a Life Force. An invisible, operative entity that actually causes Life, causes growth, causes the transformation of the invisible internal into the visible external.

“That which is essential is invisible to the eye.”
Antoine de St. Exupery

The Invisible Force is Constantly Flowing

You see, there is a literal, physical and spiritual FORCE at work in this universe that causes a seed to transform itself into fruit. Otherwise – if there was no force – the seed would just sit there in the ground, doing nothing. But that’s NOT what happens, is it (not in good, viable soil, at least)? Something definitely happens! Change happens! Transformational growth occurs! Mr. Sperm doesn’t just meet Mrs. Egg and just sit there. They integrate with each other, become one, and wah-lah, that single cell transformed itself into you and me!!!

(Also note, when you partake in a banana, it’s equally accurate to say you are eating a seed. THEY ARE THE SAME THING! The only difference – one is on one end of the transformation spectrum, the other on the other end. But the fundamental makeup is the same. More on that later )

My point: the seeds inside you – the pictures, the ideas, the dreams, the visions, the passions, the loves, the thoughts – have within them that same ability to transform themselves into external, visible manifestations, a.k.a. fruit.

In fact, this is the way Life works. I’m not a religious fellow in the least, but Jesus even used this Story of the Seed as his fundamental teaching about Life, saying if you can comprehend this Life phenomena, you can grasp everything else!

Please hear me again – the universe has this invisible force at work in itself, all the time. Just like the cornfields in Iowa have this innate ability to turn countless corn seeds into countless ears of countless varieties, the universe at large has the innate ability to turn your seeds into an abundance of fruit, an abundance of Life!

In fact, there is no other way that Life operates. Florida oranges don’t just appear out of the sky. Iowa corn doesn’t just fall from the clouds. In fact, little babies don’t get dropped off by the stork.

Everything comes from within, in every aspect of life!

It’s the way Life has been set up, and it’s plainly obvious with just a little observation.

The Seed + The Ground + The Innate Force of Life = Fruit

Because The Force of Life makes it work. It’s just been set up this way, as nature illustrates all around us!

So all we have to do is plant our seeds

Don’t hold them back, don’t keep your ideas, your passions, your thoughts, your visions inside you. Don’t let them get wasted in the wrong soil (the environments of fear and doubt). Don’t let unenlightened mentalities (the thought that something is impossible) keep you from transforming your seeds into your Life. Cultivate your mind, cultivate your thoughts, cultivate your understanding so that the seeds inside your heart can grow and be nourished, so they can transform before your very eyes from mere imaginations into tangible, visible realities!

As someone said, “even the largest oak tree began as a tiny acorn.”

And so it is with everything.

I love you,
Eric Patrick Marr

To grasp Authentic Leadership and what it truly is, let’s just think about the word “leadership” itself, before we even dive into examples and illustrations. And when reading these, think of your own life and workplace and the “leadership” you see. Also, remember Harvard’s findings that 90% of American managers are ineffective.

To lead:

• To go first. To be first. To think first. To act first. To visualize first. Think about it, if you’re not going first, you are following somebody who is.
• To move. To not be stationery. Think about this – if the status quo is simply being maintained, no one is being led anywhere. Things are just staying the same as they’ve always been. (Hmmm… sound familiar???)
• To have others actually follow. I don’t even need to clarify this, it’s so obvious. If someone calls himself a leader, yet no one follows in his footsteps, then he’s just out taking a walk! (John Maxwell)

To expand a little bit, think about what it means to go, be, think, act, or envision first. Think about what is required to do this. It’s actually quite extraordinary!

Cre*ate, (verb): to evolve from one’s own thought or imagination, as a work of art or an invention.
Dictionary.com

To create the first telephone means telephones didn’t exist before. So what “model” could Alexander Graham Bell possibly follow? To invent the airplane, what forefathers of flight did the Wright Brothers have to learn from? To declare the sun, and not the earth, to be the center of our universe, what encouragement could Galileo have obtained from his predecessors, who like him, were all severely persecuted for questioning anything the church ordained absolute? To pen the Declaration of Independence and create the world’s first democracy, what footsteps did John Hancock, Thomas Jefferson, John Adams and Benjamin Franklin have to follow in. Who dared rise up against English royalty?

The Discovery of Self Knowledge — From Within

What knowledge did Martin Luther King, Jr. have to glean from in declaring his dream?

What predecessors did Rosa Parks follow after when she refused to leave her bus seat?

What American coffee company did Howard Schultz model Starbucks after?

Whoever actually did invent the internet – did they just read a previously written college textbook to find the idea?

Did Nelson Mandela think it’d be a breeze to oppose apartheid in South Africa?

Now look at all these examples, and so many more, and notice the common threads of Authentic Leadership.

Without much reflection, you quickly see the traits of extraordinary courage, relentless passion, eternal vision and almost an unending source of energy that compels and propels these people to pursue things that followers only talk about as if they’re science-fiction concepts.

Also, I’d venture to say, most of these folks were not looking to be leaders. Even Albert Einstein, who obviously rose to great fame and notoriety later in his life, often mused at the irony of his situation. He, a man given to solitude and much reflection, eventually found himself to be one of the most famous men on the planet. And life was not always easy for young Albert. He was even quoted once as saying, “In my mind, I imagine a clock at every point in space, but in reality, I cannot even afford a single clock for my house.”

Yet he continued on.

Abraham Lincoln’s life has also been well documented. The dude wasn’t born in Kennebunkport, Maine with a prestigious last name. And the dude wasn’t handed success right out of Oxford. In fact, in the military, he actually started out as a captain of men, then later settled into his rightful fighting place – as a Private!

All of these people – Authentic Leaders. They believed in something not seen before.

Walt Disney also comes to mind. Where would Orlando, Florida be without that cat? Still partially under water, most likely!

Authentic Leaders are ones who see things first. They see and envision possibilities within themselves, as there ARE NO outside creations to copy. They have something alive within them that stirs them, awakens them, and pushes them. They see first, they say first, they build first, they act first. There is nothing for them to follow – except their own voices, their own inspirations, their own thoughts, dreams and ideas. They create brand NEW things, and this is the definition of Authentic Leadership.

And you’ll notice, these people all made society better. They made life, if not the entire world, better. And not just for themselves, but for millions and billions of people.

And these are the people we owe our own lives to. The few, but life-bettering, Authentic Leaders who dared not follow the status quo of mediocrity, but believed in themselves enough to forge a much better life and a much better world, for all of us to follow after!

// read more of EPM’s inspirational work at his blog

Personally, the funniest use of the word leadership is when politicians use it to describe their work. Uh, less than half the people in this country even vote – who’s following you, Mr. Congressman???

John C. Maxwell said it perfectly – “If you call yourself a leader but no one’s following, you’re just out taking a walk.” (paraphrase from The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership.)

I laugh almost as much when managers call themselves leaders. Oh really, you’re a leader? What if your people didn’t need their paycheck to survive, would they still come to work for you? Probably not. Managers don’t exert any influence, other than fear. Those followers are following money, not you.

You see, Authentic Leadership, while extremely simple, has been widely unknown to most of us, for most of our lives. The Apostle Paul said in this world there are many teachers, but not many fathers. (Lots of people like to give directives, but who gives of themselves?)

So let me briefly outline what Authentic Leadership is and what it’s not:

What L_A is not:

• Thinking it’s someone’s obligation to follow your directives
• Making someone fit into your mold, your image
• Commanding from on high, from above
• Self congratulating and self-centered
• Controlling
• Done externally
• Perceiving fault and inadequacies
• My way or the high way
• Rules Creation
• Wheel spinning and complicated
• Impatient
• Self Righteous
• Blaming others
• Trying to build yourself up
• Being served
• Not trusting, or trustworthy
• A Manager of the status quo
• A Maintainer

What L_A is:

• Empowering people to follow their own voices,
  to pursue their own greatness
• Integrating (engineering) other peoples’ innate
  greatness with your innate greatness
• Supporting, enabling and building from below
• People congratulating and people-centered
• Liberating
• Done internally
• Recognizing the potential for greatness within every
  human heart and soul
• Integrating (engineering) all kinds of ways
  (methods) to reach the common goal
• Love Distribution
• Focused, simple and clearly communicated for all to
  easily follow
• Teaching, Coaching, Developing, Investing
• Equality based
• Recognizing the roots produce the fruits (YOU are
  the roots. Hello?!?!)
• Building others up
• Serving others
• Built entirely on mutual trust
• A Creator of Newness
• An innovator, an instrument of change and progress
  (to LEAD implies movement, not stagnation!!!)

I think you get the picture. Hopefully.

There’s a world of difference between a title on a door and the place you have in peoples’ hearts. A few other great quotes on Authentic Leadership (all EPM paraphrased):

“What enables a great leader to fulfill his vision is not his position, but his passion.”
John C. Maxwell

“Being in power is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you’re not.”
Margaret Thatcher

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”
John Quincy Adams

/////// read Eric’s recent essay: “My Take on the Bible, Part 1” ////////